One Month Down...

One more thing we have accomplished so far:

The basis for our guest book. (mug not included in the planning, use, or archiving of said book) This has the added benefit of providing one additional responsibility for a Minion, but I am pretty sure s/he will be overjoyed with their responsibilities (seriously - I'm playing to my Minions' strengths).

Just don't ask me about the guest list, StDs, venue, or photographer right now...eep!

And then there was cake!!!

So as part of my job of handling the cake is making and eating cake. Tough job. We've decided what the top layer of cake will be and the shape it will be. That part was easy. We're using my spice cake recipe, since it's Nessa's fave. But since my mom is going to be the one actually making the cake I made the hike over to her pad (literaly I walked there) and gave her my recipe. Then for the fun and flavor of it all I took over part of her kitchen  and then we made a test run cake.

This was done for two reasons. First, so that when it come time for mom to make THE CAKE it will not be an entirely new recipe for her. And second, so we can eat it. Duh!

And since mom is a fantastic cook and baker in her own right, there was realy nothing to do in the demo/teaching department. About the only thing that was a point of interest was to find out how thick the batter is at the end. Aside from that, there was no real purpose other than we wanted to eat some cake.

Speaking of eating cake, we did, and it tasted good. Even grandma likes it. And Gran is a little picky these days as to what she likes. So I guess the top layer of the cake is Gran tested and Nessa approved. Off to a good start in my book. Now onto the next 17 layers!

Or was that 7?

Or maybe just 4?

Well, on to the NEXT layer! How's that? Yeah, that works.

It's Getting To Us All...

::sighs::
This whole endless wedding-planning thing is getting to us all...even to the cats.

What you can't see in the picture is Roshi making tiny, sad "Mew?" noises. Surrounded by magazines, tear sheets, and listslistslists.

Planning, Planning

This past week has seen my un-eventful return to work after five weeks off (not for fun - medical reasons). Which also means, not a lot going on on the wedding planning front. But we tried to make up for it once I got home on Friday!

Every Friday is now officially "Happy Hour Friday" in our house. It gives us a chance to try out new cocktail recipes and preview potential candidates for hors d'oeuvres and dishes we will be serving at the reception. Hey - when you're catering it yourself, you have to find *some* way to have "tastings" LOL

That reminds me - EJ needs to make his spice cake for FMIL, so we can all taste it, and she can make it herself (so we can all taste it!). I think he has some plan to have "Mom" bake a cake every 2 weeks leading up to the wedding...!

We also visited one thrift store on Friday, and ::5:: today, to pick up bits and pieces of decor, tableware, and fabric. We did a fairly good job, although it is very difficult to find (1) forks that are not crap, and (2) sheets that are not yellow, green, pink, or kid-related. I know we have quite a bit of time to continue to shop (avoiding looking at the Countdown meter at the bottom of the page!) but we figure if we get it in bits and pieces throughout the year it won't be as big of a hit on our wallets, and we can be a bit picky-choosy, at least for now!

I have also been eyeing the wedding dresses I find at the different thrift stores. Partly to see if I find something that will work (I have other plans, I do not want to look like a lace cake, or as one poster on IndieBride said, a giant marshmellow!), partly to oggle the construction; and partly because I think about the history that comes along with that dress...one of the reasons I like to thrift shop is because nearly everything there has passed through hands before coming into mine, and I feel a sense of connection with these others, even if I never know exactly what. I like these dresses because I think that they served their purpose, witnessed the joining of two folks who are now old and gray, and are ready to see another couple through their vows!

But like I said, I have my own plans for my dress. Unlike EJ (who has changed his mind 5 times so far, the only thing I'm certain of is that he will be wearing his Burns clan check in *some* manner), I have a pretty clear picture of what I will be wearing for the ceremony and Par-Tay! afterwards.

Because I'm making my own duds, I will be working on a prototype of sorts to figure out different techniques and practice before I make an entire dress (or, top and skirt. That part *is* still up in the air until I pick a pattern). I am very enamored with NatalieChanin and the type of clothing she offers (even wedding dresses! but *so* out of my price range!) So, I am starting with this:

three cotton t-shirts from the thrift store, a bunch of beads and sequins from my stash, buttonhole thread, scissors, and a bit of imagination, and will turn it all into an appliqued, embellished shirt. Then, once I have my skill set down, and pattern in hand, I will put together my wedding ensemble. I am pretty excited!

Who knew...

Who knew that Bridal Shows could be fun? I'm not saying it was a blast and a half, but it was kinda fun. Between all the free food, the (few) fun people manning the booths, and the loads and loads of great ideas just sitting out in the open to be emmulated by the DIY crowd (namely Nessa) it was great. Did I mention the free food? There were booths that belonged to people who didn't even handle catering and they had cake out for grabs. Was almost confusing. One of the best things I ate was given out by a booth for vacation packages or something like that. No catering, but good food.
Go figure.
Speaking of cake, it has fallen onto me to be in charge of the whole cake thing. I say "fallen onto me" but realy I snatched it up from the get-go. I'll admit I'm kinda passive on a lot of the planning and designing stuff, but I wanted to have a hand (or just a few fingers) in the food department. One of the things I love about Nessa is that she is letting me run with this cake thing. And the pig thing too, she is suportive of that as well. If you didn't know, we're planning on having pig at the reception. I've always wanted to do a pit roasted pig, and now I get to do it.
I love her.
But like I was saying, the cake is the fun project of the moment. I think I've narrowed down how I want it to look. There was some tweaking of my original thoughts after seeing some stuff at the show, I won't lie. But the visual concept is solid. Now all I have to do is decide on the flavors, colors, and number of layers. I'm thinking 4 layers plus the topper. I guess I could go with 5 layers plus the topper, but I'm not that mean to the baker. Or am I?
Well that's one Bridal Show down and who knows how many more to go. But I'm glad to say that it was fun enough to make me look forward to the next one (whenever it is). I mean, you can never have too much free cake.

Our First Wedding "Event"

Today EJ and I attended a local Bridal Expo. Since we originally registered with Wedding Wire, I randomly receive “Tips!” and “Advice!” and occasionally free offers for things. In this case, complimentary passes to the Expo.

We went, but I will admit we were a bit wary and a bit scared at what we would find. As I’ve said we’re planning a VERY non-traditional wedding and reception (to go with our very non-traditional lives!) and we were both expecting a lot of WIC (Wedding Industrial Complex) and cookie-cutter-ness to what was offered.

And there was some of that.

Much to our great surprise, and delight!, we had a blast. It was spread across two smallish expo halls, and we lucked out and went into the fuller one first (the other had a presentation going on, which we didn’t want to walk into, and which ended up taking about half the floor space in the room anyway). There was a lot to see; I told EJ my general plan is to “circle first, then browse in depth” which our Flower Maiden can attest is *always* my plan at conventions but is *never* followed through LOL. EJ caught on quickly and hustled me through once.

We spent most of our time looking at a few specific vendor-types: invitations, photography, and rentals. There was also a lot of snacky-foods available, which EJ took full advantage of: samples of cakes, truffles, tri-tip, a chocolate fountain, mini cupcakes, petites-fours (is that right?), and a bunch of other stuff. He reports that our friend Thomas makes a better red velvet cake than was offered, and the best food item was the petites-four followed by the cappuccino-frosted mini cupcake. I was able to eat one pretzel and one piece of pineapple at the chocolate fountain station, and one cherry tomato stuffed with mozzarella on a stick at the tri-tip place (it was very good, and we will probably incorporate that into our buffet). I was starving by the time we left!

At the beginning I was a bit huffy with all the people ::stopping:: and ::staring:: as they do at conventions (I don’t like crowds for this reason); then I reminded myself that the majority of the women around me are also brides-to-be, and probably pretty excited and overwhelmed like I am, and that was enough of a reframe for me to be able to relax and joke around with everyone without getting uptight.

Best parts: we looked at enough invites that we have come up with a format for when we make our own; AND I THINK WE FOUND OUR PHOTOGRAPHER! I really liked their vibe; EJ also liked them, and their photojournalistic style is what I want in my pictures. I’m looking forward to making an appointment and getting to know them a little better before I decide. We also entered their drawing for a free engagement photo shoot, so fingers crossed!

I also got a lot of enjoyment from every vendor we talked to chirping, “Congratulations!” I know they say it to everyone, but I took it personally anyway LOL

Pet peeve issue: when I specifically stated “my Best Woman” to a vendor and she immediately called Jen “your Maid of Honor”. Use my language dammit!

I was wiped out after walking around (and we only spent about 2 ½ hours total there), so we grabbed some lunch at Mother’s and a coffee at a bookstore, then came home. It was cute, we were both excited and moony-eyed at each other all afternoon; wedding planning is kinda fun and romantic! (Note to self: remember this when you get frustrated!)
- nessa

A Random Message

EJ received a *great* voicemail on his phone yesterday, from an 805 area code. Wishing us (if we were named Matt and Kristie) congratulations on our engagement, as they saw our email with our proposal story.

At first we thought it was in reference to this blog (and maybe our email got hacked? or something), but then we realized we are NOT Matt nor Kristie.

So we have random people congratulating us on our engagement. Must be some kind of wedding karma!

I almost can't...

It's hard to believe (at least for me and my oldest friends) that I found some one that I want to be married to. That's not the same as just spending the rest of our lives together. Whole different (and yet not) thing all together. Seeing how I'm not overly religious (pagan or otherwise) and I'm not from a family of wealth that needs to be tied to other families of great wealth to maintain our overall wealthiness, I've just always kinda felt the whole wedding/marriage thing was over rated.

But despite the odds, I found my self thinking "Why not?"
And then shortly after that "What could go wrong?" popped into my head.
And then "Well? What could go wrong that hasn't already?"
And then I had a whole conversation with my self over that one. Took a few hours if I remember correctly.
That's when it hit me. There was only one thing left that could go wrong.
She could say "NO".
So I mustered up my courage, called up our closest peeps, and dared her to say no. Well not really, but it sounds cool.
I still feel that marriage isn't for everyone, but I can say with a fair bit of certainty that it just might be for us. We'll see. After all, what else could go wrong?

EJ

Sooo Much To Do!

It really seems overwhelming, all the planning, scheduling, arranging, shopping, buying, talking, dreaming, and deciding we have to do (and *still* have to do!). And this has been "in the works" for over 4 months now. Well, we got engaged in August last year, but there was a self-imposed moratorium on wedding planning/discussion until after we moved into our new place in September...so really it's been 3 months.

But, man, is there a lot to do!

Especially if you are, like me, someone who never really "dreamed" of her wedding day. Marriage, sure. Being with someone for my entire adult life? You bet. But the "wedding" part of it was never really considered, at least not until EJ. And then it was more of 'what fits with us and our lifestyle' than Thoughts About The Big Day.

Luckily we are on the same page with pretty much everything so far. (I suppose some people will say, "Lucky you care about what he thinks!" and "Lucky you have someone who is interested in the wedding!") Especially with the things that DO NOT matter to us: napkins, ice sculptures, engraved wedding favors, i.e. the whole Wedding Industry ticket.

Which means we are building this event from the ground up, with little to guide us at the start (no "dream day" fantasies, no cookie-cutter "this is how you do it"). I will say that without certain online resources (IndieBride's forums, and OffBeat Bride to name two) we would both be a little more lost that we are right now.

But like good Vikings, we are forging ahead into unknown territory, taking few prisoners and going for lots of shiny things!

- nessa

First Post (LOL)

Here is our blog about our wedding! Yay, us!